When Life changes, self-judgement comes up in new forms, and I find this very intriguing. The goal to blog daily about trying to bring zen into my life, to live each day aware and awake, from what I put into my mouth and what I do, is a change. And the self-judging has followed. That's reminded me of how I used to do a metta for loving kindness. A metta is like a Buddhist prayer, but instead of directed to a larger being out there somewhere, normally called God, the Buddhist send those prayers or metta out with your breath to all beings, including yourself. So this metta goes something like this: May all beings be happy, may all beings have no suffering, may they be free of any suffering, may they enjoy the roots of happiness." Simple. But the key is, you have to offer it to yourself and really, really believe that, Buddha said, before you can offer that metta to others, you have to believe you also deserve it.
So you say "I" a lot, and not feel self-doubt, selfishness, or self-hate talk in doing this.
I was reading a book review by an author who is a famous yoga instructor- Cyndi Lee. She just put out a book called "May I Be Happy: A Memoir of Love, Yoga, and Changing My Mind."
"Bingo!" I thought, someone else who has been and still is on this path to make your life a better path to health and happiness. And I put her several levels above me because she's a revered yoga teacher. Reading the long review I am shocked to learn Cyndi Lee, yoga guru, has a long problem with hatred of her body. She has suffered her whole life with a variety of eating disorders. She wrote the book as a testament that even yoga gurus have demons within, and she like any mortal human does daily battle with hers to keep her mind in a healthy space.
That really impressed me! So when you/I say we are going to try and do the right thing, I guess we have to say that all the time, forever. That's right. And maybe that's it. Do we have to do the right thing every single day in order to alleviate suffering and the consequences of not doing the right thing from our lives? Is there no "it's a free day, go forth and eat all the donuts and drink all the wine and gossip all you want and sit on the couch and watch episode after episode of Battlestar Galactica -" because you deserve it? What? I think I am getting this. Of course you will pay the consequences of choices, over and over.
So today, day 7, I will continue to try and do the right thing. With compassion to myself for any personal failings.
And I think I am going to order that book by Cyndi Lee!
A photo from a Buddhist temple that I took in Sri Lanka "When you practice compassion, you are first compassionate to yourself, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding, especially when confronted with personal failings"
So you say "I" a lot, and not feel self-doubt, selfishness, or self-hate talk in doing this.
I was reading a book review by an author who is a famous yoga instructor- Cyndi Lee. She just put out a book called "May I Be Happy: A Memoir of Love, Yoga, and Changing My Mind."
"Bingo!" I thought, someone else who has been and still is on this path to make your life a better path to health and happiness. And I put her several levels above me because she's a revered yoga teacher. Reading the long review I am shocked to learn Cyndi Lee, yoga guru, has a long problem with hatred of her body. She has suffered her whole life with a variety of eating disorders. She wrote the book as a testament that even yoga gurus have demons within, and she like any mortal human does daily battle with hers to keep her mind in a healthy space.
That really impressed me! So when you/I say we are going to try and do the right thing, I guess we have to say that all the time, forever. That's right. And maybe that's it. Do we have to do the right thing every single day in order to alleviate suffering and the consequences of not doing the right thing from our lives? Is there no "it's a free day, go forth and eat all the donuts and drink all the wine and gossip all you want and sit on the couch and watch episode after episode of Battlestar Galactica -" because you deserve it? What? I think I am getting this. Of course you will pay the consequences of choices, over and over.
So today, day 7, I will continue to try and do the right thing. With compassion to myself for any personal failings.
And I think I am going to order that book by Cyndi Lee!
A photo from a Buddhist temple that I took in Sri Lanka "When you practice compassion, you are first compassionate to yourself, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding, especially when confronted with personal failings"
In recovery you often hear the phrase " one day at a time". I'm learning through yoga that sometimes it comes down to one breath a time.
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